Posts

Showing posts from 2012

Overwhelmed To The Point Of Tears

It has happened to me more then once recently.  I know when it's coming, too. Before, I never knew how burdened I was until I got down sick.  Sick and tired, and then I got angry because I was sick and tired. Now when I'm coming to a breaking point because of juggling all the things I need to do within a day, I feel the tears behind my eyes getting hot.  So I stop, I let everything drop, and I cry.  Stop, drop, and cry.  That's my survival skill.

There is something miraculous about crying.  Something magical happens when you just let everything go.  It's not giving up, it's giving over to the moment, because you see, sometimes the moment knows better then you do what needs to be done.  And stopping, dropping the "to do" list, and releasing the burdens through your tears is many times your best and healthiest option.  Those closest to us never like to see this either.  It's not for the weak at heart, or for the "fair weather" friend to see.  …

Handling The Storms

Well, it's been an interesting year so far.  I've grown in so many ways.  I've been tested, challenged, ridiculed, adored, fallen down, gotten back up, made a hard decision, known great joy, saw my intentions fall into place, and been scared out of my wits. But, I was able to perfect the talent of landing on my feet...every time.

I prayed for peace of mind.  I got storms.  I asked for a smooth road.  I got potholes. Man, I thought, what gives here?  Is the trick to not ask for what you want?  Well...

You see, all of these things have been for my personal growth, even though I never saw it at the time.  They are a gift bestowed by a benevolent Universe to show me that I have the chutzpah, the grit, the talent, the grace to handle whatever comes my way.  And don't get me wrong, I have days on end that are exquisite in their simplicity and joy, but my outlook during the rough times is what I believe paved the way for the good times to come.  I've learned to never ask…

Getting Through A Drought

Every life is going to experience a barren patch from time to time.  Those places where our inspiration and ability to keep growing comes to a halt.  A drought can come unexpectedly, one day you're fresh and green, and a week later your life is full of burnt grass and deep cracks.  This spiritual path I walk aways has me looking for the meaning in everything, and what I know for sure is everything that comes our way comes bearing a gift in it's hands.  So, in having to endure over the last few weeks a heat wave that had many days of triple digit temperatures, and watching my normally lovely oasis of a back yard turn into a dried up patch of earth, I had to pose the question to myself...how does this apply to me?  How does this apply to life in general?  The first thoughts I had were: nothing is dependable, nothing stays the same, and you really can't control anything.  This drought we just went through sucked the very life out of everything.  I had carefully and lovingly …

Transitions

I have figured out that one of my big life lessons is change.Things change, people change, places change, lives change, perceptions change. Nothing lasts forever in this material plane of existence, but what does last is your "inner knowing". These are the things that are unshakable, and they are different for each one of us. These are mine: my deep abiding love of "home", the love of my daughters, my absolute belief that I am loved and cared for by a power far above this human plane, and I'm strong, compassionate, loving...I am enough, just as I am.  There is an unshakable core in everyone that knows how to deal beautifully with life. When nurtured, this centeredness will allow you to be calm, flexible, buoyant, and expectant of a good outcome, no matter what. It allows you to be at peace when everything around you is running amok. I realized one day after being down on my knees one too many times, begging that I get through this or that crises, that I ju…

When Your World Is Torn Apart

On Friday, March 2nd, our beautiful state of Kentucky, our beautiful Bluegrass region of the world, suffered terrible loss and devastation when an F3 tornado ripped through the state just after 5pm. All in all that day, seventy-nine tornados blew through. Nearby Indiana had small country towns wiped completely off the map. The videos posted have been heartbreaking, footage of the awesome, terrible power of the tornados have circulated widely by now. There is no way to explain or make sense of it all. My own fear was hitting hard at about 5pm when we knew Lexington was just about to be hit. Eighty-five mile an hour winds briefly tore through the city, large damaging hail fell fast and furious. As I was heading out the door with my five cats, my child and, would you believe, my Irish Bodhran drum, (funny what you think is valuable at such a moment) the hail started. I ended up staying put, I somehow felt certain, and thanks to the excellent play-by-play reporting of our local me…

Staying Fluid

I am always thankful beyond words for the little blessings that spring up in my day: The fleeting glimpse and/or feeling that everything is going to work out....whatever the current situation may warrant. Something someone says that is just what I needed to hear. (How did they know?) Or the way the sun falls dappled across the bedroom floor through the lace curtains, dazzling my eyes and welling them up with tears for reasons I cannot comprehend. The cardinal that perches outside the window for just a moment, sparking my life with a flash of vibrant red on a stark winter's day. The sudden warm embrace from someone close to me. You know what I'm talking about, we all experience our own little moments of grace. What struck me today was a passing comment from a lovely lady, a yoga teacher no less, so how perfect when she said we need to stay fluid. I wasn't even in her yoga class this morning, I was simply talking with her about the possibilities available for me to c…